Honor the King

The last few years in America have been rough. Let's face it. We have a President who totally disregards the wishes of the people. A man who fails to respect the laws of our nation. A man who supports socialism and homosexuality. Under the current administration, the value of the Constitution has been diminished. My tax money has been utterly wasted so that people who work less than I do, can live better than I live. Our allies have become our enemies. Our military personnel have been degraded. We have sat by and watched. While giving up our freedoms, our world has become more and more dangerous. Not to mention, the epic monstrosity known as the "Affordable Care Act." 

It is a sad day in America. My heart grieves for my beloved country. I regret that anyone believed the lie that a man would change our country for the better. 

It's hard to have a good attitude right now. My healthcare plan will be cancelled next summer. Any similar plan I choose will been over $100 more than I pay right now. And I have to choose to pay that extra $100 now, or I won't have insurance for several months. Don't even get me started on the nonsense of this world - I cannot go anywhere without being exposed to blatant wickedness. I can't even sit in the privacy of my home without hearing words or seeing things that I never intended to see... or even sought out… blurted out in commercials masked in humor and innuendos. It is just disgusting. And to top it all off, the people that we have "chosen" to lead our country in truth with honor and integrity are doing a terrible job! 

Somehow even though my faith has absolutely nothing to do with all of these changes. Somehow even though it is my faith that founded and established this nation. Somehow I am mocked because I believe in the one true God. Somehow I am the "bad guy" for expecting that all able-bodied, of-age persons earn their keep or for demanding morality and honesty. Somehow it is my fault when things go wrong. 

(Or is it just me who feels this? All Bible-believing Christians should understand what I am saying.)

I think Peter understood what we are going through today. He said this in 2 Peter 2:11-17 - 

Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul; Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation. Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme; Or unto governors, as unto them that are sent by him for the punishment of evildoers, and for the praise of them that do well. For so is the will of God, that with well doing ye may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men: As free, and not using your liberty for a cloke of maliciousness, but as the servants of God. Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king.

Here Peter reminds us that we really don't belong to this country. We are pilgrims just passing through awaiting a glorious, eternal country. Peter reminds us to keep our lives honorable in the eyes of the world. Yes, they might be speaking against us right now. Yes, they might accuse us of being the "bad guy" right now. But they know by our actions (if we are living out the principles of the Bible) that when it comes down to it, our God is real and true. 

So what do we do in the meantime? 

Obey those laws that we dislike. We are doing it to bring glory to God's name anyway, not our own personal pleasure or comfort. God put the king and governors (President and Senators) in our lives to punish the real bad guys anyway. 

And on top of it all... This is God's will. We are quickly approaching the day of His return. He has had this in the books since the beginning. He knows. He is aware, and He allows. In the end, He will receive the glory. 

So be obedient. Be submissive. Be silent. To quote Peter in verse 17, Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king.

Dear Christians and fellow Americans, please don't use your knowledge of the truth as an opportunity to speak hate against these men that God. We don't need "educated" on the woes of our great nation, who has so obviously strayed from God. We get it. We are living it. Does it really honor God when we point out every obvious or minor flaw that our leaders make? No. Does it proclaim the name of Christ when we mock or offend the unsaved? No. So do we need to air our grievances on facebook for Christian and non-Christian friends to see? No. That is definitely "not honoring all men."

Yes, my heart breaks for the direction that our President has turned our nation. But I couldn't respect him more. The truth is, I don't envy his job. I do not desire the responsibility that he has. God will hold him accountable for the decisions that he has made. All of that sin that has multiplied as a result of his poor decisions, our President will have to give an account to God for. That means I really, really need to pray for this man. 

As I mourn the tragic decisions that our government has made, I have found myself praying more - and praying harder - for this man who does not know the power of my God. I find myself respecting the severe responsibility that leadership truly is. I find myself encouraging others to honor this man. He is our leader for two more years, whether we like it or not. We have to pray that he will make wise decisions. And most importantly we have to pray that he would choose companions and advisors who know Jesus Christ as their personal Savior. Pray that they would develop a healthy relationship with our President and show him our Savior. If our President doesn't know Christ, how could he possibly lead our country according the principles that it was founded upon and are laid out in our constitution?

As I mourn the direction we head, I find myself praying for the salvation of the lost. A Christian nation is determined by her people, not by the principles of her founding fathers. If we dwindle in numbers... if I fail to lead others to my Jesus... if I do not teach those younger than me how to live an honest and honorable life... how can I expect to live in a Christian nation?

Please join me in making a concentrated effort starting today. Let us pray for our President every day. Let us continue to praise God for our freedoms while we still have them. Let us honor the men that God has appointed over us. And let us look forward to the day when we leave this kingdom and move to our eternal city with our Heavenly King. 

Study Hard

My sister and I are alike in a lot of different ways. I mean, we are sisters. So we have a lot of similarities. We look a like, we talk alike, we act alike. We like the same things. If we go shopping separately, we will pick out the same clothes. We have really similar personalities. As kids this meant that we didn't get a long too well, but now we are really good friends. 

There are just a few ways that we are extremely different. I am a facts and information and research kind of person. She is an artsy kind of person who likes to do things based on her emotions and feelings, whatever interests her at the time. I am not at all like that. I need to make a list and observe the options... Every time. 

One of the big things that we were very different in high school was that I liked school and she didn't. She hated school.... Hated school! But I loved school! It was right up my alley. She wanted to be outside painting a picture. We are totally different in that way! If I am outside, I want to be reading a book or doing something. 

So every once in a while, now that she is in college, she will call me and say, "Hey, I am really struggling with this class, can you give me some study tips?" There are so many different ways to study and we are not at all alike in this area, so the conversation goes nowhere. 

But like a good big sister I give her a tip (a different tip every time!!), and she says every time, "Oh, I can't study that way; I don't learn that way."

I then offer another tip and you know what she says? "Oh, I cant study that way, I don't learn that way."

 And then back and forth over and over again. We are just different. How I need to study to learn the material, is different than how my sister will need to study to learn the material. 

Studying is important, isn't it? When buying a house, or purchasing a car, or moving to a new area, it is important to study the facts, so that you make the wisest decision for your family. So you can know what to expect. 

Just like it is important to study for a test or study for life, it is equally important... If not, more important... To study God's Word. 

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

~2 Timothy 2:15~

There it says right in the Bible that we are supposed to study God's Word! Why? So we can correctly understand the truth. 

Consider this... you are listening to a guest preacher at church. The guest preacher suggests something that is really close to what is in the Bible. Maybe his thoughts are coming from somewhere else in the Bible. It sounds legit, but something doesn't sit right. Have you studied your Bible enough to know whether this man is speaking the truth or not? Can you discern the truth?

Not only do we need to be able to accurately discern truth, we also need to be able to intelligently answer the questions of others. 

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear: 

~1 Peter 3:15~

Finally we study the Bible so that we can know God better. 

And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

~Jeremiah 29:13~

Whether you study the Bible with a notepad and pen, your iPad, Bible study books, commentaries, or podcasts, the important thing is that you study.

Find your method and grow in Christ! 

Social Single

Recently I had the unfortunate opportunity to observe several friends attack each other via very public forums. It has been hilarious to watch because it is so immature, but at the same time wholly inappropriate. What is happening? A single friend with great influence and audience is upset with a quiet and mostly private older newlywed couple for posting online frequently that they are happily married.

I seem to remember that God gives each person different situations and different trials and different blessings. We are to rejoice in where God has put us. (And let me tell you, this disgruntled single lady gets to do many things that even we happily married pastor's wives secretly dream of.)

Things that I miss about being single:

1. The abundance of time I had to spend in my devotions. As a single person, I was able to spend hours studying my Bible, meditating on what I was learning, and doing this for as long as I wanted and as often as I wanted. Now as a married person, I have a set limited amount of time to spend in my personal devotions because I have a husband who needs my attention.

2. Being able to just up and go. As a single, I could go do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. I didn't need to check in with my husband and his schedule.

3. Being involved in certain ministries. As a single I could choose to go on a missions trip as I felt led. I could whole-heartedly be involved in my own Sunday school class while teaching a Sunday school class. During Vacation Bible School, I could rush from work to church to be involved in picking up kids for VBS, taking them home after, without worrying about making dinner for my family or making sure that they get to VBS.

4. Finances. This is a big deal - As a single, I could save money like crazy. I was on track to have a sizeable down payment on my own home after only four years in the workforce. I probably would have saved for another year to have emergency funds secured. The point is my expenses were low and I could save as much as I wanted. At the same time, I was spending money on whatever I wanted. New outfit? Sure! Macbook Pro? Absolutely! (Best financial decision to date!) Shoes? Yep. Dinner out with friends? No problem.

5. Being responsible for me and accountable to me. Now I have to make sure that my husband is loved, well-cared for, happy, has access clean, neat clothes, and I don't even have kids! As a single, it was just me and I didn't have to worry about anyone else's well-being.

Not to say all of that without mentioning that married life is wonderful as well. I just want to point out that singlehood as some serious benefits.

For any lady out there who feels inadequate or un-blessed because she isn't married, please know that you have some pretty awesome privileges that many married ladies miss. Enjoy the moments that God has given you! Remember that He will use you where you are if you let Him. Keep in mind - we all go through varying stages of life. You don't know what the next step will be. Jealousy for the next phase is not necessary or appropriate. Just pray for God to work in your life....

... And please do not air your grievances on the internet against your married friends.

Thank you so much!

~ Kay

I'm Baaaaaack!

Poor blog! I have been away for far too long!

I promise it has been because of great reasons! As you know, the life situation has changed a little. I spent the majority of the summer working retail which was a totally new experience for me. There are a lot of things that you learn about people when you are working for them instead of with them. Wow! It is safe to say that I am now extra super-nice to all people in the service industry - waitresses, cashiers, grocery baggers, hotel clerks, gas station attendants. I know what it is like to be "the help."

Reason #2 - I started a full-time job! This is something that I just have to stop and praise the Lord about every day! When I worked full-time before moving South, I kinda took my job for granted. Now it is a totally different story. On top of praising the Lord for a full-time job, I am praising Him that it is in a Christian school. The classes I teach aren't what I want to teach forever, but they are certainly a foot in the door - and there have already been discussions about moving into my "field." This is a huge, huge praise!

Reason #3, Praise #2 - We moved to a suburban area and a different church. This move has changed my outlook on life! For real... My apartment is smaller (but more expensive). My grocery store is cheaper and has fresh produce! My church family is incredible. The city is nearby. I am totally loving this move. Today I actually finished decorating for fall. It is wonderful!

During this time of severe transition, there has barely been a moment to breathe. But it has been absolutely wonderful. Over the last ten months, I have learned so many unexpected lessons. You have heard about some of them. There truly is a shocking transition into ministry especially if it is a ministry that you aren't so familiar with. (If you have been there, you know.) So I have plenty to write about and plenty has been written. It is just a matter of posting.

So there is this big huge world of the internet and so many people have amazing, acclaimed, popular blogs. I paused in my writing overwhelmed with my life and overwhelmed with how so many better people than me can write a blog. Better voices spread to more readers. The fact is - if God puts something on my heart to write about, there must be one person out there who needs to read. If you are that one person, I hope my blog helps you in some way. I hope it helps me - to heal, to grow, to encourage. 

Tip of the Day

Today I received the most useful financial tip I think that I have ever heard in my entire life. Seriously! It kind of sounds weird, but it is really great.

Over the last couple of years certain things have happened to friends and family that made my husband and I realize that overall we didn't have enough insurance coverage. When we were first starting out, all we could afford was the most basic of insurance coverages. And to top it out, we really didn't know what we needed. Our agent was very kind, but not necessarily helpful.

Then a friend lost everything in a fire and didn't have enough coverage. A family member had huge medical bills not covered by insurance. And other similar situations, and we got to thinking... Do we have enough coverage?

Long story short since we just recently moved we decided to go meet our new agent and up our coverage. So glad we did!! Our agent was awesome. He answered all of our questions and helped us figure out what was best for us. Now don't just assume we got duped or sold a pitch. We had done research before and pretty much knew what we wanted. There were just some loose ends and unanswered questions.

One of our areas of discussion was life insurance for my husband. I have a tiny life insurance policy through my employer, but my husband had nothing. While the reality is that we would both really struggle financially without the other, I would be worse off than my husband.

We would really love to get a permanent life policy (meaning you pay a certain amount for a set period of time then have insurance for the duration of your life; it never expires and you never get disqualified) versus a term-life policy (meaning you pay for set period of time but the policy expires, you can be disqualified, and if you don't use it, you lose everything you paid into it). The problem is permanent life is more expensive and we cannot afford it right now. The other problem is it gets more expensive as you get older.

Note this - the younger you are, the cheaper permanent life insurance is!

So here is the most useful financial tip I think I have ever heard in my life....


Get a permanent life insurance policy for your infant or toddler.

Seriously!

Yes, it is more expensive than term life, but it is cheaper for a child than for an adult. It will cost a nice chunk of money for my husband to have this type of insurance, but would be far less if he were a baby. So get it for your kid. When he gets older, he can adjust the policy to fit his needs and those of his family, but the life insurance is there. And the painful "start-up costs" of your 20s are taken care of at a much cheaper price as an infant.

Random I know, but something to consider.

Grandparents, if you are planning on leaving your grandchildren an inheritance, consider paying for this expense when your grandchild is born. That could be more valuable and give you more "bang" for your buck.

Life insurance is one of things that is really weird to think about. I didn't like sitting next to my husband and saying, "Well, if you passed away, I would like to receive enough insurance money to pay off any outstanding debts and put a chunk of money down on a house so I don't have to move in with my parents or bear the expense of renting." How awkward is that? But if you can fit it in your budget, it is definitely something to consider.

And think about it - how awesome would it be if you taught your kids to pay it forward? You set them up with a permanent life insurance policy, so they didn't have to worry about that as an adult. Then they in turn set up their children with permanent life insurance, then your grandkids set up their children.

Train 'em right! The financial things my parents taught me, I am implementing in my life right now.

Again I know that this is totally random, but I thought it was such a good tip I had to share it!

Sign of the Times

Do you have a ton of rewards cards in your wallet? Every last one of them is for a good cause, but... there are too many of them! Every store has their own card that you have to carry around. Which ends up taking loads of space in your wallet and has a tendency to be a little more frustrating than helpful. Money savings or not, there has to be a better way!

This is exactly the conversation I had with a customer this week. She had just signed up for my store's customer rewards card, adding yet another card to her already bulging wallet. Then she said something that totally threw me.

This normal lady said, "I would take a chip in my arm if it meant I didn't have to carry these cards around."

Wow!

So I was thinking an app on my phone or a single loadable card... not a chip in anyone's arm!

Talk about a sign of the times! Here is a lady who would gladly take a chip just to lighten her wallet load.

I mentioned to her that then anyone could track you at any time, if you had a chip in your arm. (Not to be argumentative, but as part of the discussion... that had now grown to include several employees.) She suggested that you can be tracked through your phone. But let's be honest, you can turn your phone off, destroy it, leave it behind. It is not permanently attached inside you!

For anyone who has grown up in church and studied the Bible, you know the impact of this woman's mindset really means. I assumed that this was something that the "evil" in the world had on their minds. This was the first time I encountered someone normal, who was just as for this as the presumed evil.

It was mind blowing to say the least.

For the record - I had continued to conversation with my fellow store employees. Several of the ladies I work with agree that an app or card would be awesome, but under no circumstances would they be implanting any microchips into any part of their body. One of the teenagers said that she could see this being something that is required, but she said that she is going to fight it, because she thought that it was wrong. Well, at least that was encouraging.

Being a Northerner

My life has been changing so rapidly over the last two months. It was a totally unexpected change and parts of me totally did not want it, but then part of me knew that it necessary for me to keep growing. So God brought some serious changes into my life. My job situation changed, my location changed, my apartment is changing. As difficult as it all seemed at the beginning, it has been so worth it! God brought such wonderful and necessary changes.

So I have a little bit of time on my hands, so I signed up for a free trial on ancestry.com. You know that family history website?

It has been so much fun! I just had to share. My husband's family immigrated to the US within the last 100 years. My dad's family has been really hard to track. I haven't gotten very far. But mom's family apparently has tons of records! Like, way too much information!! 

Interesting things about my mom's family - they were all faithful in church. They all worked hard. They weren't rich or famous or especially important to an American history book, but they lived and that makes them important! I am a true Northerner. My family is exclusively from the Northern colonies - we landed here shortly after the Mayflower and helped settle all of the major colonial cities. 

Prior to that I have traced the family back to the 1400s. It got easier when I found John the 9th, still carrying the family name. I have only tracked back to John the 5th so far. 

Before we landed in the colonies and became as Northern as Northern gets, we were about as European as European gets. I have at least one family member from every European country. 

But at least now I understand why I sometimes have such difficulty adjusting to the South. I am a Northerner to the core! 

Fellowship Required

"No man is an island."

We have heard that before, and we know that is the truth. But how many times does it feel like we are an island - totally alone, surrounded by a sea of people??

Far too often.

For a painfully long period of time in my life, I went to a church where the people all thought that they were their own little islands. Fellowship was not a necessary part of their lives. They didn't need friends. The lifestyle that resulted was very foreign to me, and I really struggled with it. Keep in mind I am the friendly girl from Big City, Northeast, settling into the vastly different culture of Small Town, South.

I felt like I was alone in life, in my spiritual life, even at church. It was painful and lonely. In fact that isolation that I felt was what inspired me to write a blog. I just wanted to fellowship with someone.

After many months of that lonely, isolated lifestyle, our situation has changed a little, and let me tell you...

Fellowship is required!!!

It's a necessary part of life. Now I know that some people require less fellowship than others, but it is still important. There needs to be people in your life whom you can speak with about serious matters, about fun matters, and about spiritual matters.

In the last two weeks, I have had more fellowship with such precious fellow Christians, than I have had in the last year. It has been so refreshing!

An older lady and spiritual mentor simply encouraged me to stay faithful to the Lord and shared some of her life experiences and how God has worked in her life. I was able to laugh a friend, catch up with another. Share burdens and trials, what I have learned and how I have grown, with another friend.

I have been spiritually encouraged and challenged. The fellowship has made an impact on my life in a way that I have not experienced for months. If there is anything that I have learned...

Fellowship is required.

Happy Summer!

Happy summer!!

Today is the first day of summer and it is safe to say that we are in that summer stretch. That period of time when things have finally wound done from the school year but before things wind up for the next school year. Typically the last week or two of June through the beginning of August. 

Do you feel it? The quiet? The momentary calm? The excitement over pending summer vacations? The longer days and beautiful sunsets and the fireflies at 9:30 pm. It is a glorious time, if I do say so myself. 

Make the most of this time. It is truly is short and fleeting.

1. Take a few minutes to spend some extra time with the Lord. The day starts earlier and ends later. Enjoy those extra moments of day light by growing in Christ. Read through the Psalms, enjoy a devotional book in addition to your regular devotions, listen to a podcast. 

2. Spend time with your family. Section out at least one weekend each month of this summer to be strictly a family day. In June, my husband & I drove into the city and did every free activity we could cram into the day. We had a fantastic time together and only paid for parking and lunch. Maybe a day at the local park, complete with an old-fashioned picnic is just what your family needs. Whatever it is make sure that you and your family are able to enjoy it together without the distractions of life interfering. 

3. Get involved with your church. Before all of the summer activities swallow your free time, check with your church and find out ways you can get involved. If there are any special activities, be sure to sign up and mark them on your calendar. Speaking from experience, church family is an important aspect to your spiritual life. 

Those three things seem to add up to the perfect summer to me! I hope you enjoy yours!

Women in the Workforce

I just recently started doing something that I have never really done before - I started working a secular job. If you are familiar with church lingo, you know that that means that I am now working a non-church-centered job.

Up until now for my entire life, I have worked in the church building. And I totally loved it! But recently I was simply filling in as a church secretary for a person who took medical leave. That time had expired and I was jobless again.

Reality is my husband's job could support us so that I didn't have to work, but that meant that we couldn't have even the most basic internet. Working even a few hours a week (for me) meant that we could open up some funds to save money, maybe eat out every once in a while, and not stress about grocery shopping. All of the above were a welcome blessing for us!

But when I found myself jobless, we had a crossroads decision to make. Do I go back to being a housewife with a really strict budget or do I work a secular job part-time to fill my time and give us some desired flexibility?

We decided that I would go to work. I was so nervous and not even sure what I wanted to do. So I just filled out a bunch of applications for stores that I could at least support their product (office supplies, cards & gifts, and prayed that God would direct me to the right job. I got hired on the spot by a high end ladies' clothing store. It is the type of store where the clothes are modest. I wouldn't wear everything because of my personal standards or preferences but the clothing is appropriate. Its the type of store that I would not hesitate to recommend to my church family or be embarrassed to tell an unsaved person that I as a Christian work there.

So that is my little story. Now on to the blog - is it ok for me as a Christian wife to work in the secular workforce?

This is definitely a question that every individual family needs to decide for themselves. I don't think there is a pat across the board type of answer. There is a lot of pressure for Christian wives to stay at home and be that perfect at-home housewife who makes her own soap, fresh bread daily, spend hours in God's Word, and can turn any stray article into a beautiful work of art. I truly believe that not everyone is going to fit that mold.

(My husband gets annoyed when I am not working because I get stir-crazy: the tiny apartment is majorly spotless, every meal is a three course meal, and I am ready to run out and see the world when he just wants to sit on the couch and relax for a little while. In other words, I don't fit the mold.)

For those of us who don't fit the mold, we can still be godly wives - even if we don't do things just so.

Things to Consider 

1. Family: If you decided to work twenty or forty hours, would you still be able to care for your family? Plan on it not being the same schedule or as convenient of a schedule if you worked. But if your family & home would be totally neglected, you may want to reconsider working. 
2. Income: Can you live reasonably on one income? If your reasonable, necessary bills each month are higher than your husband's single income and you cannot cut anymore fat from the budget, it might be time to consider a second income. Are you trying to save money for a down payment on a home? or because your car desperately needs replaced? or because you want to start a family but need to build up emergency savings? If you are considering working to save money for a fancy vacation or upgrade the slightly dated car, you may want to reconsider working.
3. Spiritual Life: Does this new job interfere with your spiritual life? Are you going to miss an unhealthy number of church services? Will you no longer have time for your personal devotions? How will the things that you are exposed to effect your mind? Will you be required to handle, sell, or support things that you cannot support morally or that violate Biblical principles? 

There is strong case to be made for Christian women in the workforce. If you are one of these hard-working women, keep it up!

Becoming Abraham

Sometimes when you are reading the Bible, you come across these stories that seem to parallel your life. At least, that happens to me... a lot. Especially when I read about Abraham.

Lately life has seemed a lot like Abraham, as I have picked up my tent and moved more times than I care to in the last two years. As God has called my husband and I to follow Him. To where though? We have no idea! We just pick up and follow as He calls us to!

Life is a lot like Abraham, as God has pulled us away from the comfortable and content life near family and friends to a place that seemed like a foreign land with no comfort, no friends, and no spiritual encouragement.

Life is a lot like Abraham, as God has (up to this point) withheld certain things that we desire.

Life is a lot like Abraham, as God has blessed us even when we relied on our own abilities instead of relying on His strength.

Life is a lot like Abraham, as God has asked us to sacrifice many things that we hold dear.

Life is a lot like Abraham, as God has shown Himself so clearly to us in the desert moments of life.

Life is a lot like Abraham, as God abundantly rewards obedience (although I must say, He has not blessed us financially in the way that He blessed Abraham!!).

Needless to say, I feel a lot like Abraham these days, but it makes me all the more grateful for the Bible! God gave us the story of Abraham's life so plainly.

We see his faith, his failures, his triumphs,  his struggles. Over and over, we see God's hand, His blessings, His testing, His blessing, His forgiveness, His guidance.

I can learn from Abraham's life. My relationship with God can grow because I can see that God moves. Because Abraham had faith, I too can have faith.

Who in the Bible does your life parallel?

Is it Moses? A great leader possessing an obvious relationship with the Lord, but lacking support or encouragement from those close to you. Is it Hannah? A loving wife plagued by the mocking of women around here and empty arms. Is it David? A guy who had high highs and low lows. Daniel? Alone in your stand for Christ.

I don't know who your life parallels these days, but lately I think I am becoming Abraham.

Through the Fog

God never promised that life would be easy, did He?

He never promised financial wealth. He never promised health. He never promised peace and safety, as we would define it. He never promised us that people would like us - even our own friends and co-laborers in ministry. He never promised that things would go according to plan.

He promised joy found in Him. He promised to work things together for His good and for His glory. He promised safety in His will - even if things are chaos around us. He promised peace in Him.

He promised that He would be with us.

When we "sign-up" for ministry, the truth is we are entirely aware of the problems ahead. No guarantee of financial security. No guarantee that the community will like us as people. Certainty that people will be alienated or angered by the truth of God's Word. Perhaps He called you to an area that we would not consider particularly safe. We knew that times would be hard and we wouldn't always understand and all we could do was follow God.

You just hope that all of the "worst-case scenario" stuff never happens. You wait for God to show you the next step. You hope that things go according to the plan that you trust He has laid before you.

Then sometimes God does the unthinkable, and He asks you to take a leap of faith into the darkness. A mysterious, unknown, invisible future. It's foggy. You can't see what's ahead. You can barely see the future from day to day. Maybe you are packing up your home with no future home to speak of. The moving truck is in the driveway and you literally do not know where you are taking it. {Ding, ding, ding!}

God knows. He knew from the beginning. From the moment you took that first step, following Him, that lead you to take that scary leap. He knew. And He still knows. All He wants is a little faith. Enough trust to know that He is going to work things out according to His plan. To bring glory to Him.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, 

and to them who are the called according to his purpose. 

~Romans 8:28~

What I Did That I Said I Would Never Do

Yesterday I did something totally crazy... something that I had never done in my entire life... something that you would not expect someone like me to do.

I went to a movie theater!

Now before you <gasp> in horror or shock, hear me out.

I was raised in a conservative Christian home and attended a conservative private Christian school and went to a wonderful conservative Baptist church. Never once did I or my parents (or most of my friends and their parents) darken the door of a movie theater. Students in the school and leaders in the church were not permitted to go to the theater. And it wasn't a bad thing. It was the preference of those who were above us and we chose to be under those restrictions.

Well, here is the thing. My well-meaning teachers taught us that it was sin to go to the movie theaters. Looking back I would say that they taught it that way because it was sin for me to go to a theater because it was disobedience to my authority, but the way that it came across was that the sin was to darken the door of a theater.

So most of my friends and I grew up with the idea that movie theaters are bad. Even when I was no longer under the authority of my school or my parents, I chose not to go to the theater. Just because I figured if there was a reason I shouldn't go as a kid, the reason probably hadn't changed as an adult. But eventually my logic kicked in, and I couldn't come up with a Biblical reason that it would be sinful for me to go to a theater. So here were the reasons I didn't go:

1. Example - I am a leader in my church and I want to set a good example. Some people think it is sinful to go to the movies and I don't want to offend them. And for those who are ok with movies, what I do in moderation, those who follow me will do in excess. 
2. Obedience - On top of it, many of the churches that I would hang with or work for don't want their leadership going to the movies. 
3. Not the best use of my money - It is really expensive for even two people to go to the movies. For the price of 2 movie tickets, I could buy the Blu-ray in a few months and watch it as many times as I want. Or I could rent it for a dollar. Not to mention the added price of snacks and beverages. [I would say this is my #1 reason!]
4. Temptation - I could see the temptation to watch a movie in the theater that I would not watch at home. But I wouldn't spend the money. Also, I check all of my movies through the parental guides on websites like Plugged In and IMDB. 

Some things that I observed going to the theater:

1. It is much smaller than it looks in the movies. I went to a large, popular theater, and the room was smaller than I thought it would be. The screen was smaller than I thought it would be. 
2. It wasn't as crowded as it is in the movies. I went to an after-work hours showing of the movie and there were thirteen people in the theater. It felt more like sitting in someone's living room with surround sound than anything. I guess I thought it would be more like seeing a Broadway show.
3. I wasn't knocked to the ground for walking through the doors or suddenly overwhelmed with guilt. 
4. In fact, sitting in that theater sure was a lot like sitting in the theaters at museums watching educational films. (Hmmm....) Or sitting in a Broadway show, but smaller, less-crowded, cheaper, and filmed instead of live. 

What I liked:

1. It was a really fun date night for my husband & I. 
2. The surround sound!!
3. There were no distractions - like my phone ringing, someone knocking on the front door, the air conditioner kicking on so I can no longer hear the tv, feeling the need to multi-task, etc.
4. The popcorn - now I understand the hype about movie theater popcorn :)

What I didn't like:

1. The price, especially considering I can purchase or rent it cheaper. 
2. All the previews - I really like fast-forwarding or just skipping right over those, especially since I want to watch the movie, not the previews. 
3. The possibility for disruptive guests - I assume that can be circumvented by choosing a family-friendly time to attend
4. Being reclined on my couch in my pajamas with a blanket is more comfy than sitting in those only fairly comfortable seats. 

So overall, I don't think that it is a sin to attend a movie theater. If it is a sin to go, shouldn't it also be a sin to rent a movie at Redbox? go to Blockbuster (if you can find it!)? watch things on Netflix? have a television? God wants us to be careful of what we place before our eyes, and we do that at home and outside the home. 

I am not anymore godly or holy or "Christian" because I watched a movie on Blu-ray in September 2013, than I would be if I watched the movie a few months earlier. 

Going to a movie theater was actually pretty fun. I have no intention of making it a regular habit (I would go broke!), but maybe every once in a while for a date with my husband. But it is up to you. 

Obey the requirements of those in authority over you. Wisely choose what you place before your eyes. Remember that you are a representative of Christ wherever you go and whatever you do. 

And remember, this is the girl who would have never darkened the door of a movie theater a year ago. 

~Kay

Gifts for Missionaries, Part 1

Missionaries strive to do something that many of us, sitting comfortably in the United States, are unable or lack the courage to try. They leave their families, their friends, their comforts, to live in a foreign country with a foreign language, different food, transportation, living styles. And on top of that, they choose to lead people to the Lord and establish churches. That alone is difficult when everything else is going well.

Missionaries are among the heroes of our day. It is our responsibility to love them, pray for them, and care for them as much as we can. I personally love the idea of treating the missionaries like royalty or celebrities. They are the heroes and we should make it clear that we really feel that way about them!

How can we be a blessing to the missionaries, especially as they travel on the road for deputation or furlough?

The Missions Closet
A fun way to be a blessing to the missionaries is to set up a little closet or place for them to "go shopping" for supplies that they need on the road. Now let me stress a few things... The missionaries are on the road a lot. So when you are thinking of supplies, consider things that are useful on the road. (I heard of one church that asked for donations for their missions closet and received items such as lamps, large picture frames, and curtains.) Also many times the missionary families are living out of their cars, so you want to provide items that won't take up valuable real estate in the vehicle. A wholesale club-size bottle of body lotion would not be appropriate in most situations.

One church that has a missions closet determines that they are only going to supply things that they can get for free. This is a good idea. Free is always a great price. So they solicit local companies to donate items. The local companies give generously, but the reality is the church ends up with expired products and dollar store cast-offs. Not really a great way to honor our missionaries or make them feel special.

With the idea of "living out of the car," here are some generic items that you can purchase at a range of prices.

• Car maintenance items - window washer fluid, Armor-all, Rainex spray
• Coloring books, crayons, colored pencils, pencil sharpeners (the kind that catches the pencil shavings until you can empty it in a trash can)
• Pens & pencils, various sizes of notepads 
• Crossword puzzles, word search, sudoku books
• Fresh set of quality earbuds - You can probably skip the cheap ones that you will often find at the dollar store or the check out aisles. Apple earbuds can be expensive, although they are quality and often preferred. There is an abundance of nice earbuds that range from $7-15. 
• $5-10 Itunes or Amazon gift cards for portable devices, so they stock up on some reading material or music
• Pocket hand sanitizers and lotions, Wet Wipes (in the individual packages)
• First aid kits or loose medical items that typically go in them, like bandaids and neosporin 
• Diapers and wipes
• Rolls of quarters - I personally have had missionaries request this!! Great for toll booths, car washes, and the laundry mat!
• Selection of snack items, gum, mints, and 6 or 12-packs of water

I would also like to suggest travel size or small toiletries items, but with this note: Toiletry items are personal products. Some people can only use certain brands for health reasons; some people will only use particular brands; and other people don't care at all. The travel size items would be helpful just to hold a family over until they are able to get to the store in a few days. So if you are going to have these items available, make sure they are decent brands and a reasonable size. 

Whenever you are choosing items for your own "store," be selective. Choose items that you would want to receive. Remember that these missionaries are special people, and they should be treated as such. 

How do you stock your closet if the church budget cannot afford it? Share your vision with the church family, then once a year ask the church family to donate these specific items or designate their offering to the "Missions Closet." For those who are donating items, you could ask them to bring them in those fun reusable shopping bags. Then you could use the bags as shopping bags for the missionaries. 

Additional ideas for gift baskets will come in Part 2, coming soon!!

Getting Out of the Sunday School Mindset

For those who you who teach classes teenagers through adults...

Too many times we teach a lesson with the memories of our childhood Sunday school classes in mind. Let me explain - as a kid, most of us were taught the most basic information about a Bible story. The main characters, what they did, and a lesson. That's not necessarily a bad thing, because it was instilling the facts into the heart of a child. It is on their level.

Side note: I have to warn though, from over-simplifying. Sometimes a story is so simplified that it is no longer accurate. A couple of weeks ago, an upper-elementary child was retelling me the story of Job - what they had just learned in Sunday school, but this version was so simplified and so dramatic, it was completely inaccurate. Other stories that come to mind are Hosea and the passage about the tower of Babel. (Rehash the stories in your own mind as you would tell them to a child, then go and read the passages in the Bible. A little different, huh?)

Now I totally understand that the way we teach children and the way we teach those who are more mature adults, is different. But it is our responsibility to teach a "story" Biblically and accurately - not in accordance with the traditional Sunday school lesson that we have heard our entire lives.

Here is an example: the Tower of Babel.

This is the story we hear and teach - Nimrod and his men built a tower to reach to heaven, to get to God, so they could be like God or overtake God. God got angry at their sinfulness and mixed up the languages, forcing the people to spread out.

But let's take a look at what the verses say.

Genesis 11:1-4

And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech. And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there. And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them thoroughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for morter. And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.

When I am reading the Bible, I like to reiterate what I just read, so that I can understand in layman's terms. Basically what we just read in this passage was that everyone on the earth spoke the same language. A group of them were traveling together, and decided to settle in the land of Shinar - which we know historically to be a very fertile and fruitful land. A good choice for a permanent home. Then they got together and decided to build a city and tower. This tower would be very tall, distinguished tower that would stand out as a landmark on the plain. (Like the Sears tower in Chicago and the Empire State Building in NY) Why? They wanted to be remembered for their unique and unsurpassable feat, because they were concerned that they would be scattered across the planet. 

Don't take my word for it! You just read it in the verses above. So moving on...

Genesis 11:5-9

And the Lord came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded. And the Lord said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do. Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another's speech. So the Lord scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city. Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the Lord did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the Lord scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth.

While they were building, God can down from heaven to check it. But He noticed a problem - the people were unified in a central location. This was in disobedience to His command to populate the earth, not just the plain of Shinar. As a punishment for their disobedience, God confused their language, creating multiple languages, so that those who were once unified could no longer understand each other, and they now had to scatter. 

The sin in this act was not the building of a tremendously tall building. The sin was in their failure to populate the whole earth as God had commanded. This is evidenced in their reason for building in verse 4 and in God's reason for punishment in verses 8-9. 

God doesn't reprimand or punish them for trying to access Him through man's ways or for establishing a new religion or worshipping inappropriately. 

Surely there is an argument for prideful behavior, and it is likely that Nimrod was not a godly man. But the fact is what we traditionally teach is not what actually occurred in this passage. 

The moral of the story here is to teach the Bible biblically. Use the Bible as your source, not your memory, not someone else's material. Be careful to keep the truth in all that you teach. 

Graduation Gift Ideas

It is that time of year! The most wonderful month of a high school senior's life - graduation!

The projects are turned in, senior trips are enjoyed, the finals are complete, the cap and gown is pinned into place, and the graduation gifts start rolling in! Let me tell you, the entire month of May the year that I graduated from high school was BY FAR the BEST month of my entire high school career. 

Great for the graduate. Less great for the person who has to come up with a creative gift idea on the cheap.

Here are six different gift ideas. Everyone is going to either give them a 2013 graduation frame/photo album or money. Since everyone has those covered, why not get them something useful? 

1. Mattress pad - Those college mattresses are tough, like miserable tough. Like wake up with a kink in your neck every day tough. While the typical college student gets "used to it," it would really go a long way to get a good night's sleep every night. 
2. Blanket - Think of those cheap seasonal flannel blankets that you can get at Kohls for $5 by the end of the Christmas season. They are great for cold nights when you can't control the thermostat, quick naps, comfort studying on the floor on you bed in your friend's room. Pair with a bag of candy and you have a great (and affordable) gift.
3. Electric Hot pot - Not all colleges or dorms offer the convenience of a kitchen, or they do not come with appliances. A hot pot is great because it heats
   
   liquid in about two minutes flat. Many meals of ramen noodles, Mac & cheese, soups of all varieties, even tea and hot chocolate were made in that hot pot. It was easy to clean and store. You can usually find these for about $10 at Walmart or Target, but they can be hard to find because they are rarely in stock (usually sold out or called by other names by region). 
4. Flatware & Utensils - this is my go-to gift every year. Think plates, bowls, cups, plastic or metal utensils. I have bought this for almost every graduate since I graduated from college. At the end of the summer season, stock up on plastic picnic items when they go on clearance. If you buy them during graduation season, this would cost a fortune, but stores all but give the picnic-ware away at the end of the season. They usually come in packs of four in fun colors, so you can purchase gifts for four people for $10-15. Give each graduate one (even two) of each item. I like to throw in a package of coordinating party napkins and a small bottle of dish soap (CVS often has this for $0.99, combined with a $0.99 coupon = FREE!). And know you now
   
   why this is my favorite gift. :) 
5. Carry-on suitcase or overnight bag - These kids are going to have a lot of overnight trips in their near future. Traveling home for the weekend, visiting friends, going on a college trip. They will already have the big suitcases, but not always the smaller bags for shorter trips. I personally like the oversized beach bags (not the mesh or light-weight kind though). It's so easy to toss all of your overnight things into the beach bag and you are ready to go. They also store easily. Again this would be an easy end-of-season clearance item to get really cheap. Bonus ideas: luggage tags. For girls, a nice makeup case set. They will have to tote that stuff around, you know. 
6. Gift cards - this will always make my list of gifts because they are so wonderful. Walmart & Target are obvious choices because they carry almost everything. But Amazon would be a good option as well. Your graduate will probably end up buying some used books for many of their classes from Amazon. Another good option is Shutterfly. The books are fun to make and awesome to have, but the price tag can be daunting when the alternative is store photos on your hard drive. But a gift card coupled with Shutterfly's never ending sales would make a photo book an amazing graduation gift. 

Quick note from a graduate, there are a few gifts you want to avoid. Journals, photo albums, frames, and anything graduation related. Why? Because when July rolls around, you no longer think of yourself as a graduate but as a freshman. And everybody else, who isn't creative with their gifts, is going to buy the standard dated graduation gift. 

Oh... And money is always a great gift! 

Have fun shopping! 

A Favorite

Perhaps one of my favorite passages in the Bible, Isaiah 55:8-13 are always an encouragement to my soul. My God is in control of everything. He knows far better than I. His plan is already in progress. He knew before I even thought about it. Above all, His plans and His purposes and His thoughts will bring total glory to Him.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands. Instead of the thorn shall come up the fir tree, and instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle tree: and it shall be to the Lord for a name, for an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.

Burden

Recently I have noticed a common theme in the Christian circles that I run in - at the ladies retreats, events, and Bible studies, on Facebook and Pinterest, in personal conversations, and far more blogs than I even knew were out there. So much of it revolves around being a housewife. Cooking organic meals from scratch, storing a months worth of food in the freezer, decorating to perfection, never spending more than [$20] on any purchase ever, getting married, having children, homeschooling, and doing everything just so. This whole idea is lauded and praised - and for good reason! To do all of these things successfully with the Lord's help is nothing short of an incredible accomplishment.

But I have been burdened by it, because it seems like I, as a Christian woman, have to fit into this mold or I am not fulling God's will for my life by being the Christian woman that He intended for me to be. That I am not fulfilling God's highest calling for my life. That's a lot of pressure!


It seems so trivial. Am I a better Christian than you because of gifts and talents that God gave me, but not you? Are you a better Christian because you have children and I don't? You know that doesn't make any sense.


When did my homemaking skills and child-birthing record determine my spirituality? I mean really - cooking organic meals from scratch - not everyone has time for that. It really doesn't fit into my schedule. I try to make healthy homemade meals as often as I can, but if I can save a few minutes by using a ready-made product, why not? Decorating my house: I try, I really do. I think my home looks better than average, but I only have so much of an eye for that kind of think. Truth: I like shopping. Spending money doesn't scare me (as long as it is in the bank account). God happened to bring a wonderful, godly, handsome man into my life when I was 19. One of my dearest friends is 25 and still waiting patiently for God to bring a man into her life. In the meantime, she is totally focused on God, growing spiritually, and blessing others. She is a strong person and I look up to her. God was completely of our lives. I am not more spiritual because I am married and my friend is not. I don't have children. I haven't been married long - long enough to have at least two children, but I don't. Does that mean that I am not spiritual? No! That means that God has chosen to lead my life in a different direction at this time, and I am totally ok with that.

So when did we forget that our "godliness" is determined by our personal, private relationships with our Savior? Our personal upward spiritual growth, our prayer life, our testimony to others, our efforts in bringing more people to Christ, and living overall according to the principles of the Bible.

To all of you women out there like me: Don't be discouraged if you can't live up to the seeming expectations of others. Don't be disappointed if you aren't married yet or don't have children. Enjoy this chapter of your life. You may never get to experience it again! Always remember that God is in control of everything, not you. You don't have to live up somebody else's ideas (if they don't come from the Bible!). Be the person that God intended you to be. He called you to be someone special. Be that person.

~Kay

In Case of Emergency

The year that my husband and I got married, over ten other couples - close friends - got married. It was so much fun! All of us planned our weddings together, shared decorations, and made sure our weddings were as unique as we were. A couple of months after the wedding celebrations settled down and we were now managing life as married adults. You know - nice apartments, not bachelor pads or a house full of girls. Opening gifts, pouring over the beautiful photos, buying cars or even houses, sending out thank you cards for all of the fantastic gifts, buying furniture, decorating our own homes, inviting our fellow newlyweds over. It was a blast!

Until a lovely fall day when we got word that the apartment of one of the new brides had burned to the ground. Everything she & her new husband owned was gone. All of the brand new furniture, the piles of wedding gifts, clothes, a lifetime of photos and mementos were gone in an instant. The couple was at work when their neighbor's unit caught fire, but there was nothing they could do when their home was destroyed as a result. Then things got worse when they found out that their insurance wouldn't cover even half of what it would cost to replace everything. Important personal documents and identification were destroyed. Something like this is always a tragedy, but for newlyweds who barely have their feet on the ground, it was even more so. 

How do you prepare for something like that? It is certainly not something that you want to think about, but it is a reality. Fire, floods, tornadoes, earthquakes. They all happen. But the truth is… We don't expect them to happen to us. I didn't think it could happen to me! But there it was - my dear friend lost everything in a fire. I realized that if something similar would happen to my husband & I, we would be sunk. 

So what do you do? How do you prepare for the worst?

I will be honest… I don't totally know. It seems like one of those things that you never know until it happens. And of course, it is one thing to get be prepared and it is another thing to stay prepared over the years. More than anything… it is a lot of work. 

So here is my thought… Take one step at a time.  Start now, as you freshly married. Don't wait until everything is put away and accumulated. 

Over the next couple of weeks, I will be working on some posts for preparing in case of an emergency. It is a personal project that I am working on in my own life. But I have to mention this... Invest in a home inventory software. Sure you can totally do it via Excel or Numbers, but trust me it is so much easier to just use the software! 

I had been using excel to keep track all of my possessions. It was a nightmare! There was so much information that needed recorded. Then one day I was just checking out some apps for my mac and I discovered this wonderful software by Binary called "Home Inventory" (similar products are available for windows). It has made a world of difference! What took me days to do before, took me a few hours today with the program. 

So step one: Inventory your home before you get so many years down the road that this task becomes impossible. 

Vacation

This week my husband decided to surprise me with a very impromptu mini-vacation! How glorious! Here is where I sat... a gloriously empty beach....

With a book in hand, staring at this...

Hardly a person in sight, sitting on the shore on a cool day for a few hours. It was amazing!

Somehow I managed to end up as burnt as a lobster. My sister reminded me to check the expiration date on my sunscreen next time (two years expired... oops!!!!). 

No matter how many ways you cut it, I have the best husband in the world. He is so sweet and thoughtful. I love my man!

Happy Sunday!

Happy Sunday! Here is a song that I absolutely love listening to! I could totally see this being sung in the throne room of heaven. It's glorious! (You have to look it up.) My favorite portion is the last two stanzas. Jesus Saves by Travis Cottrell. 

Hear the heart of Heaven beating, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
and the hush of mercy breathing, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
Hear the Host of angels sing glory to the new born King 
and the sounding joy repeating, Jesus saves! 

See the humblest hearts adore him, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
and the wisest bow before him, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
See the sky alive with praise, melting darkness in its blaze 
There is light forevermore in Jesus saves! 

He will live, our sorrow sharing, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
He will die our burdens bearing, Jesus saves Jesus saves 
It is done will shout the cross, Christ has paid redemption's cost 
While the empty tomb's declaring, Jesus saves! 

Freedom's calling, chains are falling, hope is dawning bright and true 
Day is breaking, night is quaking, God is making all things new 
Jesus saves! 

Oh to grace how great a debtor, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
Are the saints who shout together, Jesus saves! Jesus saves! 
Rising up so vast and strong, lifting up salvation's song 
The redeemed will sing forever, Jesus saves!

Stewardship vs. Frugality

What do the words stewardship & frugality mean to you? They are just words. In Christian circles, these words tend to go hand in hand, but they really are quite different. According to the dictionary frugality maintains the idea of using resources sparingly, whereas stewardship gives the idea of supervising or managing resources for another.

When I was growing up, there was always a great emphasis placed on stewardship. My parents, my Pastor, ministry leaders, Christian school teachers always stressed the importance of being responsible and faithful with the resources that God had entrusted to me.

There was an extremely high cost of living, as there tends to be with any big city. While the millionaires and wealthy abound, they were not always the ones actively involved in my life. Everyone I knew faithfully used their weekly coupons, purchased items on sale, and rejoiced over a great find on the clearance rack. While the financial side of life wasn't always easy, everyone worked hard and lived within their means. They spent time with their family and loved the Lord. They were faithful to church and diligent in all that was set before them. From my child-like perspective, it seemed that they all knew God had entrusted them with their lives and they were responsible to care for it according to His principles. No matter how tight finances would be, they knew that God would provide for the tiniest need as long as they were good stewards with what they had.

I could give you story after story of how I saw this play out in people's lives.

That was stewardship.

Then I moved and the new word seemed to be "frugality." Here in Small Town, South, absolutely everything is cheaper - except for maybe groceries, because we have to pay high taxes on food. There is a lot less affluency in this area, but that's ok because it's not like I was rubbing shoulders with the millionaires anyway.

It is different though. Everyone seems to do the extreme coupon thing. Everyone shops at thrift stores & consignment stores almost exclusively, if they shop at all. And they are all always worried about money. There are certain numerous people that I absolutely cannot talk to unless the conversation is wholly centered around money. These people will drive 50 miles in their low mpg vehicle to pick up a single free item - then they will stop for lunch with the family as a reward for the money they saved. They will spend hours trolling the internet for free products, coupons, and cheap work. But they will totally miss out on time with their family, or they just can't find time to serve in ministry at church. Money is on the brain, and it is always something that they are worried about.

When I moved to this Small Town, South, I wanted to fit in with all of the other ladies. It seems like there are two key "rights of passage" - having babies (not happening anytime soon), and couponing (I guess I can do that). But I quickly discovered something about that couponing. I was worrying about money. Money is something that God is supposed to take care of. I was spending more money on groceries than ever, simply because they were on sale and I had a coupon. The ladies told me it was a good deal. Before I just bought what I needed when I needed it. If it happened to be on sale or I happened to have a coupon, it was an added bonus. Occassionally I would stock up on expensive or hard-to-find items if it truly was a good deal. But with the couponing, I was no longer relying on God to provide for me, nor was I just being a steward. I was trying to be frugal and I was trusting me.

In God's eyes, not relying on God and instead relying on me is sin. I can dress it up here on earth as a good thing, but the heart behind it is sin. When I was just a steward, I never really worried about money. Sure, I still wondered how a bill was going to be paid, or I was painfully aware that I didn't have enough money for something that my family needed. But God took care of all of that. The bills were always paid. As a steward, I carefully planned my meals with affordable ingredients. I did due diligence and searched for good deals. I tried to use coupons and buy things on sale as often as I could. Not because it was my money, but because it was God's. I knew that in the end, as long as I was faithful, He would take care of it. And He always did.

But the minute that I tried to live frugally, it suddenly seemed like the bills couldn't get paid and I was spending too much money in an effort to save money and I was busy worrying.

Stewardship & frugality - they are just two words. They mean a lot. Maybe they mean different things to you. But I know I learned the difference for me.

One thing I know for sure. God specifically tells me not to worry about finances for food or clothing because He has under control.

No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon. Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?
Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. (Matthew 6:24-24)

And God specifically tells me to be a good steward of what He has entrusted to my care in Matthew 25.

Couponing, thrifting, and similar activities aren't bad. I don't mean that all. We as servants of God, just can't be consumed with them.

Be responsible, but let God be in control of your finances.